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Old 12-03-2007, 07:45 PM   #1
Really?

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Ask the Oracle

In an effort to make Wrangler Forum evolve, i have devised a fun thread for us all.

I am The Oracle! Ask me anything. Unlucky in love? Should you buy new socks? What color should i dye my cat? Should i get these rims? Will my Jeep become permanently incapacitated? You name it, i can answer it.

Tell me...what knowledge do you seek?


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Old 12-03-2007, 07:48 PM   #2
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Why does pasta give me gas?

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Old 12-03-2007, 07:49 PM   #3
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Because you touch yourself at night.

The Oracle has spoken.
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Old 12-03-2007, 07:53 PM   #4
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What is the meaning of Life?
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Old 12-03-2007, 07:55 PM   #5
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Hmmmm..... The answer is coming to me......

Oreos and cold milk!

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 07:58 PM   #6
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Why is this stupid song stuck in my head?
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:01 PM   #7
Really?

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Why is this stupid song stuck in my head?
Could it be that your head is stuck around the song? Yes...This is the answer you seek!

The Oracle has spoken!


And YES Odhinn.... Beyond the great meadow, 'neath the twisted elm, someone awaits to pull your finger!

Once again.... The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:06 PM   #8
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If you were to fight with the Wizard of Oz who would win and why? I'll take my answer off the air.
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:08 PM   #9
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How come I'm never in the right place at the right time?
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:08 PM   #10
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why did i buy a vehicle that
a) gets crappy gas mileage
b) freezes my ass off in winter
c) cant haul much more than a beer cooler
and
d) seems to be a all you can eat buffet for rust termites

????????????
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:10 PM   #11
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If you were to fight with the Wizard of Oz who would win and why? I'll take my answer off the air.
Fear not the answer of the All Seeing, All knowing Oracle! The answer of course is I! For the Wizard of Oz is a little bi*ch who hides behind a curtain!

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:12 PM   #12
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why doesn't the oracle answer questions in a timelier manner?
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:12 PM   #13
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How come I'm never in the right place at the right time?
The Oracle suggests a watch and a map.

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:13 PM   #14
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When playing pictionary how do you draw a "few"?

How do belly buttons collect lint?

Where does the other sock go?

Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

Why can't I sneeze with my eyes open?

Why don't we have an opposable toe?

Why is it impossible to lick my elbow?

...I have many questions oh wise one.
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:14 PM   #15
Really?

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why did i buy a vehicle that
a) gets crappy gas mileage
b) freezes my ass off in winter
c) cant haul much more than a beer cooler
and
d) seems to be a all you can eat buffet for rust termites

????????????
For you have evolved far beyond that of other members of your species.
You need not drive a large shiny phallic symbol to prove you are a man!

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:16 PM   #16
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Why the hell would the National Guard send me to North Dakota in freakin March?! And why wont they issue me some winter gear for the trip? (they're not, by the way).
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:17 PM   #17
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why doesn't the oracle answer questions in a timelier manner?
Be not foolish and tempt the wrath of the Oracle! Your call is very important to us and will be answered in the order in which it was recieved. Para la prensa dos del espaƱol.

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:17 PM   #18
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Fear not the answer of the All Seeing, All knowing Oracle! The answer of course is I! For the Wizard of Oz is a little bi*ch who hides behind a curtain!

The Oracle has spoken!
Now I'm not calling you a little bitch but, isn't the Oracle's computer just a curtain "so to speak" or "metaphorically"? So its looks at this point to be somewhat equal. I'm just saying.
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:17 PM   #19
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sweet, im gonna go out and buy me a new Harley then.

thank you oh Wise One.
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:20 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by 02Prove View Post
When playing pictionary how do you draw a "few"?

How do belly buttons collect lint?

Where does the other sock go?

Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

Why can't I sneeze with my eyes open?

Why don't we have an opposable toe?

Why is it impossible to lick my elbow?

...I have many questions oh wise one.

In order...

Draw a duck with 3 legs.

Does not the moth fly to the flame?

Could it be that socks do not exist?

Because it is the way of the universe.

Yes... The Mythbusters say it is so.

Becasue then your shoes wouldn't fit.

The Oracle suggests taking Yoga classes!

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:23 PM   #21
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Oh you're gooooood... I don't get the duck thing but I hafta think about it a minute.
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:25 PM   #22
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Why the hell would the National Guard send me to North Dakota in freakin March?! And why wont they issue me some winter gear for the trip? (they're not, by the way).
It is the way of the Guard. If it's hot... You're hot. If it's cold...You're cold.
If it's raining, you're training. These mysteries do not go un-noticed by the Oracle.

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:26 PM   #23
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Should I get a tow strap for my jeep??!!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:27 PM   #24
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I'm glad to know the belly button lint answer, I've always wondered...............or at least wondered for the last couple of years.
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:28 PM   #25
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Now I'm not calling you a little bitch but, isn't the Oracle's computer just a curtain "so to speak" or "metaphorically"? So its looks at this point to be somewhat equal. I'm just saying.
The Oracle shakes his mighty fist and advises you to pay no attention to the man behind the screen!

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:29 PM   #26
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Should I get a tow strap for my jeep??!!
Hmmm.....I see the answer....Yes, it's quite clear now.

The answer you seek is yes... Make sure you get one heavy enough to pull a Hummer out of a mud hole.

The Oracle has spoken!
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:33 PM   #27
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If i put "Rubicon" stickers on my "sport" will it make it more capable?



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Old 12-03-2007, 08:36 PM   #28
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If i put "Rubicon" stickers on my "sport" will it make it more valuable?



Hmmm.... Speek to me oh mystic sprits and bring forth the answer...
Ahhh....Yes.... I have the answer to your query.

The value of ones Jeep has nothing to do with stickers... The value is based on the spritual bond between you and your Jeep. However it will add $25 to the overall value.

The Oracle has spoken.
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:39 PM   #29
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Does the Oracle know whats wrong with my junk?
http://www.wranglerforum.com/yj-chat...ved-13684.html
Also, I miss the McRib sandwich. You think they're gonna bring that one back?
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Old 12-03-2007, 08:44 PM   #30
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Oh wise and mighty Oracle, should I girlie-fy my tattoo with vines, a waterfall or just leave it as is?

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