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Old 09-30-2007, 01:36 PM   #1
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Chuck Norris Proven Facts

-When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.

-Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

-As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.

-Some people like to eat frogs' legs. Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs. Hence, snakes.

-When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.

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Old 09-30-2007, 01:47 PM   #2
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Old 09-30-2007, 01:49 PM   #3
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-While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
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Old 09-30-2007, 02:04 PM   #4
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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.
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Old 09-30-2007, 02:04 PM   #5
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zomg >.<
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Old 09-30-2007, 02:10 PM   #6
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zomg >.<
huh? ^


-It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
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Old 09-30-2007, 04:49 PM   #7
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Chuck Norris' semen cures cancer. Too bad he has AIDS.
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Old 09-30-2007, 05:05 PM   #8
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Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.

Chuck Norris has been dead for 5 years, but the grim reaper hasn't gotten up the nerve to tell him.

If you play the song "Stairway to Heaven" backwards on your record player, you will hear Chuck Norris banging your sister.

Chuck Norris speaks braille fluently.

Chuck Norris can pop a wheelie on a unicycle.
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Old 09-30-2007, 05:18 PM   #9
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whats a record player?
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Old 09-30-2007, 05:22 PM   #10
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-Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

-Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

-According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
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Old 09-30-2007, 05:25 PM   #11
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God its like im in barrens chat all over again...

# "I don't have a drinkin' problem! I drink, I get drunk, I fall down. No problem!"
# "I don't drink anymore ... course, I don't drink any less either!"
# "I like my beer like I like my women, stout and bitter."
# "Oh, I'm just a social drinker. Every time someone says, 'I'll have a drink', I say, 'So shall I'!"

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Old 09-30-2007, 05:38 PM   #12
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God its like im in barrens chat all over again...

~Lev
So does this mean there's already a Chuck Norris facts thread? My bad if there is, I'm just a fan of the facts:

-Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

-The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.

-Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down!
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Old 09-30-2007, 05:46 PM   #13
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So does this mean there's already a Chuck Norris facts thread? My bad if there is, I'm just a fan of the facts:

-Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

-The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.

-Chuck Norris doesn't throw up if he drinks too much. Chuck Norris throws down!
Lol barrens chat is a area in World of Warcraft where all the kids like to gather and tell chuck norris jokes and murlock jokes.

Soo crazy they have made shirts about it.



Continue
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Old 09-30-2007, 05:57 PM   #14
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god, I hated barrens chat. Never did figure out how to turn that crap off. :/
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Old 09-30-2007, 06:21 PM   #15
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Old 09-30-2007, 06:24 PM   #16
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-Chuck Norris tears cure cancer. But he has never cried. Ever.
-Chuck Norris doesnt wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
-The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed misserably.
-In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
-Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
-Chuck Norris doesnt read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
-Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

I have a lot more haha
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Old 09-30-2007, 06:24 PM   #17
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Old 09-30-2007, 07:05 PM   #18
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can i just post the website link?
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Old 10-01-2007, 05:25 AM   #19
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As did I.
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Old 10-01-2007, 04:09 PM   #20
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can i just post the website link?
I'm sure you can, but do you want to ?
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Old 10-03-2007, 11:49 AM   #21
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OMG it followed me.

First SWG, then EQ2, WoW, and now here.
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Old 10-03-2007, 12:31 PM   #22
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guess it would ruin the fun. so i wont
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Old 10-06-2007, 09:04 PM   #23
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Chuck Norris clogs the toilet when he pisses.
Chuck Norris can eat a Rubix cube and poop it out solved.

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