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Old 12-10-2008, 03:59 PM   #1
G54
out there

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Dogs and Cats POV

Excerpts from a Dog's Diary

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


Excerpts from a Cat's Diary

Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet.
I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of.
However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight.
I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
However, I could hear the noises and smell the food.
I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.'
I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking.
I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return.
He is obviously retarded.

The bird has got to be an informant.

I observe him communicating with the guards regularly.
I am certain that he reports my every move.
My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.
For now.........
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Old 12-10-2008, 04:38 PM   #2
that's what she said

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OMFG, that is awesome! that was so fricken hilarious, and so true. you have hit the nail on the head with how dogs and cats view the world and situations.

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Old 12-10-2008, 04:45 PM   #3
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awesome
pure awesomeness
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Old 12-10-2008, 06:00 PM   #4
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Funny stuff and probally true.
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Old 12-10-2008, 10:18 PM   #5
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I hate cats.
Am allergic to them 2.I go to my Son's house and one of his cats thinks it is a dog, and is loving on me. (i'm thinking punt!) What am I supposed to do!?!


BTW, my dogs have the same favorite things! Dogs rule!
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Old 12-11-2008, 09:30 AM   #6
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Speaking of a pet's point of view..... Seen This?



The Gadget: The Uncle Milton Pet's Eye View cam is a low-res interval-timed camera designed to clip to the collar of a dog or cat, under the assumption your pet's life has some vaguely interesting non-eating/sleeping/pooing component.

The Price: $40

The Link:
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Old 12-11-2008, 10:25 AM   #7
Really?

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OMG!!!!

If we were to put one of those on Benny... OMG!

You know those cheesy Sci-Fi pictures where the camera crew gets eaten by a Sabre Tooth Tiger? Yeah, the footage would look like that. A lot of sudden camera movements followed by a couple huge steely toothed noshes at the camera. Then, snow. Or maybe the old style test pattern with the Indian.
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Old 12-11-2008, 12:40 PM   #8
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i've seen this before and it's still funny as hell. I'm a huge dog person, i love my boxer more than I like most people. LOL

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