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Old 04-19-2007, 12:39 PM   #1
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Offensive new joke - you've been warned

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southerner?

Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.
You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

.................................................. .
Democrat's Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor! Or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him
that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away? What does my wife
think? What about the kids? What does the law say about this situation?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage
such behavior.
.................................................. ..
Republican's Answer:

BANG!
.................................................. ..

Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?

Son: Can I shoot the next one?

Wife: You Ain't Taking That To The Taxidermist!

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Old 04-19-2007, 12:40 PM   #2
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Roflmfao!!

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Old 04-19-2007, 01:52 PM   #3
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Nice!
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Old 04-19-2007, 02:08 PM   #4
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Bang! :d
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Old 04-19-2007, 02:54 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OdhinnsChick View Post
Roflmfao!!
x2
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Old 04-19-2007, 03:30 PM   #6
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Southerner's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click..... (Sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?

Son: Can I shoot the next one?

Wife: You Ain't Taking That To The Taxidermist!
Thats Me
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Old 04-19-2007, 03:33 PM   #7
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Or just double tap him in the forhead
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Old 04-19-2007, 03:44 PM   #8
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I would deff. be a mix of repub and southern. 2 in the chest, 1 in the head, with the wife/son comments.

guess we can call that the WV answer

good joke though.
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Old 04-19-2007, 05:25 PM   #9
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How offensive!


I thought The Glock had a bigger magazine!

Fun Stuff MOG
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Old 04-19-2007, 07:33 PM   #10
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the real question is Why are you and your family walking down the streets of Fallujah? Good joke.
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Old 04-19-2007, 08:31 PM   #11
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I wouldn't be carrying a glock but...
BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG...

Funny, I didn't know I was Southern.
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Old 04-20-2007, 05:04 AM   #12
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7.. 1911?
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Old 04-20-2007, 07:15 AM   #13
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Good stuff! I tend to vote democrat and own a Glock .40 though. Guess I don't fit the mold
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Old 04-20-2007, 07:32 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JCS05Rubi View Post
7.. 1911?
Compact firestar 9mm, the 1911 is too big for her.
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Old 04-20-2007, 08:45 AM   #15
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gotcha. I got my gf/fiance a Bersa thunder .380 7 rnder. best decision i ever made. she loves it, i love it, it was cheap, 2,000 rnds no issues cept a spring, and i can put it anywhere while on my farm. compacts are great . I want a .40 or .45 compact now
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Old 04-20-2007, 10:06 AM   #16
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Quote:
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7.. 1911?
1911 = 10

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Old 04-21-2007, 04:09 AM   #17
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I got the Bersa .380, also, sweet little pistola, however, the guy that comes in the door will see the .45!
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Old 04-21-2007, 04:19 AM   #18
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When we first started looking for a carry piece for Amy she ran across a Llama .380 at a pawn shop and fell in love with it, the Llama is the predecessor to the Bersa. Unfortunately it was gone when we went back to buy it. it took over a year to find something she liked as much.



I really like the feel of the Bersa's, if I ever give up my Browning I may go for one in 9MM, I'd like a compact for carry.
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Old 04-21-2007, 04:56 AM   #19
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Quote:
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I got the Bersa .380, also, sweet little pistola, however, the guy that comes in the door will see the .45!
I pity the fool that tries to break into our house, I love Texas!
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Old 04-21-2007, 06:32 AM   #20
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I pity the fool that tries to break into our house, I love Texas!
Shhhhh their already watching us. You know the guys in the black coats and dark glasses.
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Old 04-21-2007, 07:54 AM   #21
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Quote:
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1911 = 10

Thats a high cap mag bro, standard 1911 mags are 7 rounders

unless im going crazy...
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Old 04-21-2007, 08:00 AM   #22
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buncha gun totin', shack sitting, manifesto scribblin' weirdos


No guns in my house.... though I feel sorry for anyone who breaks in cuz I'm looking forward to using my training.
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Old 04-21-2007, 08:05 AM   #23
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Im not that bad tiny, only 4 in my house...

The farm in WV..now thats a totally different story
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Old 04-21-2007, 08:06 AM   #24
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Quote:
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buncha gun totin', shack sitting, manifesto scribblin' weirdos


No guns in my house.... though I feel sorry for anyone who breaks in cuz I'm looking forward to using my training.
Guns are a last resort at our house. Right behind the Dogs hiding under the bed, the Functional medieval swords and my boot.

I only pull a gun if I am going to use it. No need in waving it around in the air lookng like a fool.

Who you callin a weirdo, They are truely after me, I'm not Paranoid
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Old 04-21-2007, 10:09 AM   #25
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I'm joining the texas state miltia =P
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Old 04-21-2007, 10:20 AM   #26
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We have a miltia? I thought that was just the neighborhood defense council.

BTW that joke was hilarious, I think I broke a rib laughing.
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Old 04-21-2007, 12:38 PM   #27
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3 rifles, 1 shotgun, 2 pistols, 2 bows, 1 sword, couple of tactical knives. 3 men above 6'2" all over 200lbs. 1 big dog. 2 words "bring it".

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