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Old 10-30-2012, 07:09 PM   #31
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It's cheaper to keep her.

Been married 23 years next month, mostly good days and some not so good but I can't complain. Just part of the ride. She doesn't fuss when I play with my toys (jeeps, guns, motorcycles).

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Old 10-30-2012, 08:25 PM   #32
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It's cheaper to keep her.
Ya know why divorce is so expensive?

B/C It's worth it. Lmao.

In all seriousness, spending every day with that one is a pleasure. A gift. A blessing. But it has to be THAT ONE. The rest just leave you disappointed.

Another grumpy (not yet old) man :/

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Old 10-30-2012, 08:26 PM   #33
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I think for me its having someone who is always there and will believe , trust & support me during anything. I know she has my back & Ive got hers.Might sound crazy but in the 7 yrs weve been married weve never had a fight.Does she sometimes annoy me,sure.Sometimes we dont agree but we never would say anything to each other we wouldent want said to ourselves.Respect.
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Old 10-30-2012, 10:50 PM   #34
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...........trust.................Respect.
I have been married before and it feel apart in a huge way. Every since then I have looked at the ladies in a different way. I don't look for the things that I used to back when I was 20 years old and living life a little to fast.
Trust and respect are the two main things I am looking for anymore. And let me tell you I am having a damn hard time finding anyone that I can say both words about. Maybe I am still jaded, who knows.

A not old but extremity picky man.(the next one has to be perfect or I am willing to just date them for a few weeks at a time till I give up on it)
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Old 10-31-2012, 03:19 PM   #35
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Old 10-31-2012, 08:27 PM   #36
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The only regret I have about marriage is that my 2nd wife was"nt my 1st. Its nice to know what LOVE and TRUST is.
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Old 10-31-2012, 09:05 PM   #37
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the only regret i have about marriage is that my 2nd wife was"nt my 1st. Its nice to know what love and trust is.
x2
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Old 10-31-2012, 09:53 PM   #38
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Craziness
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Old 10-31-2012, 09:54 PM   #39
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Wow

Nice
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Old 10-31-2012, 10:39 PM   #40
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Old 11-01-2012, 07:01 AM   #41
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I'm man enough to say, marriage is amazing. I get to share my life with my best friend, my partner, the mother of my child. She has my back, and I have hers, always. And no, she doesn't read this forum, so this isn't me just sucking up
No, she doesn't read the forum, just your posts.

I gotta say, I agree with everything you said, except I don't have children. I think a lot of men who are married just like to talk out their asses in an attempt to look "cool" in front of their friends, when in fact they're actually very happily married.

Ya know how men always blame women when it comes to getting rid of that Muscle Car they've owned for 20 years so they can get a Grand Caravan? The translation for that is, "I'm a sorryass, pathetic, yes-man and I can't stand up for myself."

Anyhow, I'm married to a woman whom I love unconditionally and wouldn't have it any other way.
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Old 11-03-2012, 02:41 PM   #42
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"Say one good things about marriage."

Pretty wives with great personalities. Been married to my lovely gal for 25 years and she's still the love of my life. A true Proverbs wife.

Johnnymoto, sorry to hear about your struggles. My Dad always said a few things when you're thinking about getting hitched:

1) It's about more than her looks and her figure and the way she fawns over you BEFORE marriage. Because if she's a b-tch, then nothing about her appearance will mitigate your misery.

2) Don't ignore the little things. If she's adorable and charming but she treats waiters and janitors like sh-t, then you're in trouble someday because that's how she'll treat YOU once you disappoint her.

3) If you want to see what' she'll be like in 25 years, look at her mother.

4) Watch how her mother treats her father. If they're still cute and in love, fine. If she treats her husband like he's a worm, watch out. Because we, eventually, become like our parents in large part.

Ladies, this is not meant to be sexist, because the same advice goes for you -- just switch the genders in the advice.

After dating my gal for six months, I met her parents and did as my Dad advised. Her mother still adored her father, she never disrespected him, and while she was a big of a nag and a busybody (all gals are, let's be honest) she was a charming future mother-in-law. My Dad was 100% right.

"Marry in haste, repent at leisure." -- Jewish proverb

"My wife and I, we were happy for 20 years. Then we met each other." -- Rodney Dangerfield
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Old 11-04-2012, 07:54 AM   #43
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See my post #42 on this topic. Hope it helps the next time you get interested in a gal.
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Old 11-05-2012, 05:15 PM   #44
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Married now for 31 years. I love her more now than the day we married! Marriage is the best thing I ever did. Getting through the hard times makes a marriage stronger if both agree that divorce is not an option at the start and the vows given are done not only to each other but to the Almighty. If the opinion of an old 54 year old matters. I hope it does to our six children.
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Old 11-05-2012, 05:56 PM   #45
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Married now for 31 years. I love her more now than the day we married! Marriage is the best thing I ever did. Getting through the hard times makes a marriage stronger if both agree that divorce is not an option at the start and the vows given are done not only to each other but to the Almighty. If the opinion of an old 54 year old matters. I hope it does to our six children.
My wife and I had no interest in getting married...or so we both said. It was I who felt like I just needed to go the extra step to prove myself to her and there was nowhere else for the relationship to go. I'd told her I loved her, made her a commitment to stay with her for the rest of my life, etc. It was all but etched in writing. Now it is. I don't regret it a bit and I hope she feels the same way...
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Old 11-06-2012, 10:24 AM   #46
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We are working on our 18th year of marriage. Life is going to have highs and lows no matter if you are single or married. Marriage is an opportunity to do those highs and lows together, to have someone to high-five when it is great, and to have a shoulder to cry on when its not (even if the one who made you cry is the one you are doing life with).

If I had to sum up and simplify what I think I've learned over the years about what makes a good marriage tick, and keeps it in a place where it can enjoy the highs and weather the lows, it would go something like this:

Generally speaking what a man needs most from his wife is positive feedback that he is meeting her needs and is desired because of it. Positive feedback comes in the form of smiles, playful flirtation, and signs of trust.

Generally speaking what a woman needs most from her husband is certainty. When she tests certainty once in a while to be sure it is still there she needs her husband to quietly stand firm (not run off and hide or yell back), and be a shelter in her storm. I often wonder if God wired women with an automatic certainty test that fires off about once a month.
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Old 11-06-2012, 10:37 AM   #47
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I often wonder if God wired women with an automatic certainty test that fires off about once a month.


I'm only coming up on our 3rd year, but its pretty amazing know someone's always there. We've gone through a few different jobs and moves, and she's always said "OK where to?" Every time. It makes my living so much easier.
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Old 11-07-2012, 08:45 AM   #48
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Hey guys my original question meant about the advantages of being married vs. just living together like a married couple. I should have asked "Advantages" of "M" vs all the other forms of relationships. I don`t see one advantage, ( other than a Religious matter ), but I do see MANY disadvantages.
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Old 11-07-2012, 08:55 AM   #49
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Hey guys my original question meant about the advantages of being married vs. just living together like a married couple. I should have asked "Advantages" of "M" vs all the other forms of relationships. I don`t see one advantage, ( other than a Religious matter ), but I do see MANY disadvantages.
- proof she feels as strongly about you as you do about her when she says "yes"

- tax breaks

- insurance breaks

- guaranteed nookie
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Old 11-07-2012, 10:36 PM   #50
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Hey guys my original question meant about the advantages of being married vs. just living together like a married couple. I should have asked "Advantages" of "M" vs all the other forms of relationships. I don`t see one advantage, ( other than a Religious matter ), but I do see MANY disadvantages.
I'm not sure I understand the "live like a married couple" concept. Marriage is a stage in a relationship. The marriage stage is taking the step from just saying you commit to each other to making it legally binding that you commit to each other. There is no living like, you are either committed to the point that you have made a legal contract or you aren't. Sort of putting your money where your mouth is. At least that is the way I see it.
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Old 11-08-2012, 02:56 AM   #51
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I'm not sure I understand the "live like a married couple" concept. Marriage is a stage in a relationship. The marriage stage is taking the step from just saying you commit to each other to making it legally binding that you commit to each other. There is no living like, you are either committed to the point that you have made a legal contract or you aren't. Sort of putting your money where your mouth is. At least that is the way I see it.
^ This.
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Old 11-08-2012, 11:53 PM   #52
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Hey guys my original question meant about the advantages of being married vs. just living together like a married couple. I should have asked "Advantages" of "M" vs all the other forms of relationships. I don`t see one advantage, ( other than a Religious matter ), but I do see MANY disadvantages.
Johnny, the advantages of marriage versus just living together might not be evident to you but they're there. They are: 1) Women want commitment and, ultimately, the ultimate commitment -- marriage. The best doesn't really come out of the relationship until you're married. 2) You need commitment. You may not feel so now, or think so, but you do. Assuming you're still a few years shy of 40, let me say now you'll want commitment someday, and want to raise a son or two as well. A succession of lovers, who come and go after a couple of years, is not the same. 3) Children need married parents. 4) Lower taxes -- filing jointly rather than individually. Okay, there are a few men who truly are immune to love and the desire for commitment, but I'll bet dollars to donuts you're not one of them. You're just reeling from a bad first marriage. Sorry about that. See my original post (#42) for my initial thoughts about finding a wonderful wife.
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Old 11-09-2012, 12:04 AM   #53
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When you are just living together you still feel a sense of freedom.
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Old 11-09-2012, 12:07 AM   #54
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Old 11-09-2012, 01:22 AM   #55
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It's a guaranteed piece.......oh wait.......it's not even that anymore.
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Old 11-09-2012, 05:47 AM   #56
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Johnny, the advantages of marriage versus just living together might not be evident to you but they're there. They are: 1) Women want commitment and, ultimately, the ultimate commitment -- marriage. The best doesn't really come out of the relationship until you're married. 2) You need commitment. You may not feel so now, or think so, but you do. Assuming you're still a few years shy of 40, let me say now you'll want commitment someday, and want to raise a son or two as well. A succession of lovers, who come and go after a couple of years, is not the same. 3) Children need married parents. 4) Lower taxes -- filing jointly rather than individually. Okay, there are a few men who truly are immune to love and the desire for commitment, but I'll bet dollars to donuts you're not one of them. You're just reeling from a bad first marriage. Sorry about that. See my original post (#42) for my initial thoughts about finding a wonderful wife.
My wife was adamant she didn't EVER wanna get married, PERIOD. I got second opinions from some female friends and coworkers and they all told me the same thing; regardless what she said or claims, she wants to get married. They were right.

So, I went out and got an engagement ring, proposed, and got an immediate response, which was obviously, "YES!" And then the tears started flowing...
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Old 11-10-2012, 03:45 AM   #57
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Married now for 31 years. I love her more now than the day we married! Marriage is the best thing I ever did. Getting through the hard times makes a marriage stronger if both agree that divorce is not an option at the start and the vows given are done not only to each other but to the Almighty. If the opinion of an old 54 year old matters. I hope it does to our six children.
Senior, I'm not far behind you ... 25 years and three kids.

Some of the best advice I got about marriage was when I was 19, and had the chance to spend time with an older female cousin who'd been married just a couple of years -- long enough to be over the honeymoon but short enough to still be fresh. She said:

- "80% of the time I'm still madly in love with Jeff [her husband]"
- "10% of the time I couldn't care less"
- "10% of the time I want to kill him and hide the body."

Then she laughed.

For years I would ask other married folks what they thought about her wisdom, and they all said, "that's about right."
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Old 11-10-2012, 09:26 AM   #58
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Taxes- insurance- legal issues are already in place, social acceptance in traditional circles - and if you have kids it is easier

Everything else is in the eye of the beholder, their religious values and their personalities . For some it is a blessing and for some its a noose. Marriage doesn't make that so but the individuals involved.

Being married is a Legal contract which is why you need to submit this contract to your county/state . Which is also why you need to have it legally severed. This contract enables protection fir the one you love in case of your death. On the other hand this contract is complicated to break should you want to sever the agreement.

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