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Old 12-18-2007, 09:33 PM   #1
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Tequila Christmas Cake

Saw this somewhere else, just to damn funny.

Tequila Christmas Cake


1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 bottle tequila
2 cups of dried fruit

Sample the tequila to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the tequila
again. To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and
drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of b utter in a
large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point
it's best to make sure the tequila is still OK. Try another cup... just in
case. Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and
chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the fruit up off floor. Mix on the turner. If the fried
druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the lequita to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt
Or something. Check the tequila. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your
nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can
find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall
over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through
the window. Finish the tequila and wipe counter with the cat.

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Old 12-18-2007, 09:55 PM   #2
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That's how I felt the other day when I was stupid enough to drink Everclear thinking it would make a nice drink with dinner.

But that's my kind of baking!

"If I were going to give people one clue as to how to achieve true happiness, it would be this: Find something you would die for, and live for that."

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Old 12-18-2007, 10:16 PM   #3
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been there done that... boy howdy did my neighbors think I was gonna burn down the apartment complex, I didn't get that burnt smell out for like a week and a half...
Keepin the peace.

The difference between sport and combat is that in combat you bury the one who comes in second.

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Old 12-19-2007, 02:41 AM   #4
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I didn't make it to the oven!
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Old 12-20-2007, 08:13 AM   #5
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