The Idiot Report........ - Jeep Wrangler Forum
Jeep Wrangler Forum

Go Back   Jeep Wrangler Forum > General Discussion Forums > Off-Topic

Join Wrangler Forum Today


Reply
 
Thread Tools

Please support our sponsors and let them know you heard about them on WranglerForum.com
Old 02-06-2007, 11:31 PM   #1
Jeeper
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: pahrump Nevada
Posts: 1,241
The Idiot Report........

The Idiot Report........

Number One Idiot of 2006
I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center
Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants.
I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away.

Here's your sign, lady. Wear it with pride.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~

Number Two Idiot of 2006
Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of the plane and home. Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them. It turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing.

Here's your sign, guys. Don't get it wet; the paint might run.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
Number Three Idiot of 2006
A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the Branch and wrote this: "Put all your muny in this bag."
While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's window.
So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, "OK" and left. He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.

Don't bother with this guy's sign. He probably couldn't read it
Anyway.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~
Number Four Idiot of 2006
A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that; measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40.
Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture, this time of handcuffs. He immediately mailed in his $40.

Wise guy....... But you still get a sign

************************************************** *
Number Five Idiot of 2006
A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf.
He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said, "Because I don't believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because she didn't believe him. At this point, the robber took his driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and she put the Scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.

This guy definitely needs a sign.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~

Idiot Number Six of 2006
A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers. The first one shouted, "Nobody move!" When his partner moved, the startled first bandit shot him.

This guy doesn't even deserve a sign
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~
Idiot Number Seven of 2006
Arkansas: Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back knocking him unconscious. It seems the liquor store window was made of Plexi-Glass.
The whole event was caught on videotape.
Yep, Here's your sign

(Please note that all of the above people are allowed to vote)

**********************************************
IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township

Administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road.
The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."



From Kingman , KS .
__________________________________________________ ____
IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
He was a Chef?



Yep...From Kansas City !
______________________________________________
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked: "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge? To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."



Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
__________________________________________________ _____
IDIOT SIGHTING:
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine.
She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"



She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS
__________________________________________________ _
IDIOT SIGHTING:
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving the company due to" downsizing." Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word was spoken.
We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.



This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
________________________________________
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.



A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office no less.
__________________________________________________ __
IDIOT SIGHTING:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!"
His reply, "I know - I already got that side."

mr4x4 is offline   Quote Quick Reply
Old 02-07-2007, 03:18 PM   #2
delicate %$^&*@ flower

WF Lifetime Member
 
tiny terror's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: California
Posts: 14,753
And I thought this was going to be a list of user names. Dang.

tiny terror is offline   Quote Quick Reply
Old 02-08-2007, 04:45 PM   #3
Jeeper
 
jjseel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Rowlett, TEXAS!
Posts: 2,955
Dang Tiny! are we having issues too?
__________________
jjseel is offline   Quote Quick Reply
Old 04-13-2009, 07:52 AM   #4
Jeeper
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Seattle
Posts: 259
heheh, those guys from Boeing were stupidvisors,, I knew one of them. (dolt)
But anyways, of all the people you think would know that, you would think a supervisor would know.. Those rafts are pretty darn big, and the built in beacon goes off as soon as you inflate the raft, think of the embarrasment he suffered from the other 2 families he had with him, he took them down this river called the skagit that gets hundreds of migrating bald eagles. Thier eagle watching trip was cut short,,*LOL*
Rainycity is offline   Quote Quick Reply
Old 04-13-2009, 08:40 AM   #5
Jeeper
 
05GT-O.C.D.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 1,415
Great list.

Quote: (Please note that all of the above people are allowed to vote)

That explains it.
05GT-O.C.D. is offline   Quote Quick Reply
Old 04-13-2009, 11:15 AM   #6
I HAVE A BELLYBUTTON!

WF Supporting Member
 
cavediverjc's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: On the grassy knoll...
Posts: 6,982
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rainycity View Post
heheh, those guys from Boeing were stupidvisors,, I knew one of them. (dolt)
But anyways, of all the people you think would know that, you would think a supervisor would know.. Those rafts are pretty darn big, and the built in beacon goes off as soon as you inflate the raft, think of the embarrasment he suffered from the other 2 families he had with him, he took them down this river called the skagit that gets hundreds of migrating bald eagles. Thier eagle watching trip was cut short,,*LOL*
Not to mention that false emergency EPIRB activations are highly illegal and costly for the moron that sets one off......

__________________
Americans sleep safely in their beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do them harm...

Happiness is a Barrett M82A1 .50 caliber and a target at least a click out........

I come in peace. I didn't bring artillery. But I'm pleading with you with tears in my eyes, if you f**k with me, I'll kill you all.....
cavediverjc is offline   Quote Quick Reply
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Jeep Wrangler Forum forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
wrangler had the worst report.. bpowa TJ General Discussion Forum 41 12-20-2011 09:56 AM
alternator idiot light question GMR CJ Tech Forum 0 05-30-2007 09:59 PM
Ol'bob's fishing report ol'bob Off-Topic 5 05-21-2007 10:43 AM
FCC Releases Report and Order in "Morse Code" Proceeding Geeps Communications and Electronics 1 12-19-2006 08:47 PM
Carfax Report Tonight???? keithpeindl TJ General Discussion Forum 5 08-13-2006 11:15 PM


» Rates
Get low rates on auto insurance in Canada!

» Network Links
»Jeep Parts
» Featured Product

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:33 AM.



Jeep®, Wrangler, Liberty, Wagoneer, Cherokee, and Grand Cherokee are copyrighted and trademarked to Chrysler Motors LLC.
Wranglerforum.com is not in any way associated with the Chrysler Motors LLC