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Old 02-25-2012, 01:44 AM   #1
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Tried to rope a deer...

This was posted a LONG while back but I didn't want to revive those threads from the dead since they had some replies and that tends to confuse people replying to old ass posts...but thought those of you who weren't here in 2009 would appreciate the laugh. I got this from my grandpa in an email a while back...along with him advising me not to try it, because ironically enough, I work on a farm raising white-tailed deer.

-----------

I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it.

The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that, since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and transport it home.

I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope.
The cattle, having seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it.

After about 20 minutes, my deer showed up -- 3 of them. I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me.

I wrapped the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good hold. The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope situation.

I took a step towards it...it took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope and then received an education.

The first thing that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start pulling on that rope.

That deer EXPLODED.

The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could fight down with a rope and with some dignity.

A deer -- no chance.

That thing ran and bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it and certainly no getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not nearly as good an idea as I had originally imagined.

The only upside is that they do not have as much stamina as many other animals.

A brief 10 minutes later, it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head. At that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted to get that devil creature off the end of that rope.

I figured if I just let it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me and that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and I would venture a guess that the feeling was mutual.

Despite the gash in my head and the several large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by bracing my head against various large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were in, so I didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death, so I managed to get it lined back up in between my truck and the feeder - a little trap I had set before hand....kind of like a squeeze chute.

I got it to back in there and I started moving up so I could get my rope back.

Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very surprised when I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of my wrist.

Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where they just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head --almost like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts.

The proper thing to do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was ineffective. It seems like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds.

I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by now), tricked it.

While I kept it busy tearing the tendons out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose. That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day.

Deer will strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back feet and strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp. I learned a long time ago that, when an animal -- like a horse --strikes at you with their hooves and you can't get away easily, the best thing to do is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive move towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can escape.

This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman and tried to turn and run.

The reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer may not be so different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong and 3 times as evil, because the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down.

Now, when a deer paws at you and knocks you down, it does not immediately leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed. What they do instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you are laying there crying like a little girl and covering your head.
I finally managed to crawl under the truck and the deer went away.

So now I know why when people go deer hunting they bring a rifle with a scope to sort of even the odds.

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Old 02-25-2012, 05:56 AM   #2
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OMG! I don't know if I'm laughing at the events or the justice of it! So what kind of injuries came out of this??? Did the other deer ever come back?

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Old 02-25-2012, 07:05 AM   #3
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OMG! I don't know if I'm laughing at the events or the justice of it! So what kind of injuries came out of this??? Did the other deer ever come back?
It's a joke...it's not real...
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Old 02-26-2012, 10:54 PM   #4
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LOL

Actually, while looking it up...they can't confirm it's real from their investigating on Snopes, but the original story which had a few extra paragraphs added on about the events had enough information to make it extremely plausible, even leaning slightly toward being a true story.

If it was a true story, however, it did not involve me...although if someone were to try it, I can tell you without a doubt that the outcome would be extremely similar in nature.

Funny TRUE story involving me...sorta. I have a tame doe on the farm who will attack me when she's hungry and I have a bag of feed on my shoulders. Not an aggressive attack, but she'll do everything she can to get that bag out of my hands and shove her head into it before I get a chance to dump it into the feeders. I've had days where I've gotten into wrestling matches with her trying to get her to back off out of my feed sack so I can dump it.

One day I was out feeding them and my roommate tagged along...he's used to being around the deer as he helps me out every now and then. He'd seen me wrestling the doe off in the past and decided to help me out...so when she goes trying to attack the feed sack, I'm not paying any attention...but I hear a couple thumps followed by a crash.

I look back to see the doe running back over to get the feed sack and my roommate laying against the fence...he thought he was stronger than her (he thought wrong) and threw her into a headlock to try to hold her back. She didn't like that and started flinging her head all around to knock him off and finally flung him about 6 feet away into the fence. Quite comical to say the least...
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Old 02-27-2012, 09:11 AM   #5
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LOL

Actually, while looking it up...they can't confirm it's real from their investigating on Snopes, but the original story which had a few extra paragraphs added on about the events had enough information to make it extremely plausible, even leaning slightly toward being a true story.

If it was a true story, however, it did not involve me...although if someone were to try it, I can tell you without a doubt that the outcome would be extremely similar in nature.

Funny TRUE story involving me...sorta. I have a tame doe on the farm who will attack me when she's hungry and I have a bag of feed on my shoulders. Not an aggressive attack, but she'll do everything she can to get that bag out of my hands and shove her head into it before I get a chance to dump it into the feeders. I've had days where I've gotten into wrestling matches with her trying to get her to back off out of my feed sack so I can dump it.

One day I was out feeding them and my roommate tagged along...he's used to being around the deer as he helps me out every now and then. He'd seen me wrestling the doe off in the past and decided to help me out...so when she goes trying to attack the feed sack, I'm not paying any attention...but I hear a couple thumps followed by a crash.

I look back to see the doe running back over to get the feed sack and my roommate laying against the fence...he thought he was stronger than her (he thought wrong) and threw her into a headlock to try to hold her back. She didn't like that and started flinging her head all around to knock him off and finally flung him about 6 feet away into the fence. Quite comical to say the least...

I can vouch for how strong they are.

I was 17 and out muzzleloader huntin' on our mountain side and came across a doe quartering away and I hit her pretty hard with my .54 Cal Traditions Flintlock.. Well she ran down the hill (more like stumbling and falling and rolling) so i took my good old time waitin for her to bleed out and just be laying there.

As I came upon her, she was layin' alright, still good and alive. Well, not wanting to waste any meat by puttin another .54 cal ball in 'er, I decided (my apologies for this) to cut her throat - other hunters will attest to having to do this.

After a bit she went limp and I rolled her over, pulled out my knife and went to gut her. Before I did, I knew at some point her nerves would cause her to kick so I tucked her rear legs under me.

As soon as that knife touched her skin.. she sent me flying. All I remember is looking down at the ground as my face kept getting closer and closer to the snow.

Tell ya what, I've played football and rugby since I was a kid and I have never been thrown like that before in my life.

True story.
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Old 02-29-2012, 01:57 AM   #6
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I can vouch for how strong they are.

I was 17 and out muzzleloader huntin' on our mountain side and came across a doe quartering away and I hit her pretty hard with my .54 Cal Traditions Flintlock.. Well she ran down the hill (more like stumbling and falling and rolling) so i took my good old time waitin for her to bleed out and just be laying there.

As I came upon her, she was layin' alright, still good and alive. Well, not wanting to waste any meat by puttin another .54 cal ball in 'er, I decided (my apologies for this) to cut her throat - other hunters will attest to having to do this.

After a bit she went limp and I rolled her over, pulled out my knife and went to gut her. Before I did, I knew at some point her nerves would cause her to kick so I tucked her rear legs under me.

As soon as that knife touched her skin.. she sent me flying. All I remember is looking down at the ground as my face kept getting closer and closer to the snow.

Tell ya what, I've played football and rugby since I was a kid and I have never been thrown like that before in my life.

True story.
LMAO! Sounds like she was getting a little revenge before her spirit left her body!

Did it go something like this?

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Old 02-29-2012, 07:00 AM   #7
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LMAO! Sounds like she was getting a little revenge before her spirit left her body!

Did it go something like this?

hahahaha

somethin like that b
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Old 02-29-2012, 07:53 AM   #8
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"For my next stupid redneck trick, I will now ride this deer like a bull and see how long it takes me to get gored! Please try this at home because we need to thin out the population people." lol I was taking my girl to class this morning and out of the corner of my eye on the left I saw a little 4 or 6 point young buck speeding toward the road. The car in front of me slammed on its brakes as the little buck sprinted in front of her. Why was he running you ask? His 8 point buddy didn't like him being around the doe standing in the field. Deer are crazy as hell!!

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