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Show Me Your 8008135!
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2 months down the road, when she said: "Honey, you might wanna sit down for this ... I'm pregnant" ... :redface:
Or when her friend slips that she's pregnant while you and all your/her friends are at the bar and giving her sh*t for ordering a Coke...and you're all running around cheering and announcing that you're gonna be a daddy and she turns around and says, "Honey...we need to talk..."
 

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"So I decided to impress my girlfriend by driving into the lake to try out my new snorkel..."
^That will never get old.

These are some that I've either said or had said to me:

"last night around 3am..."
"We decided to check out that bar out there by the airport..."
"Well, it looks like a strip club..."
"My cousin gave me a jar of moonshine..."
"I need a second opinion, I've been on a dry spell and that fat chick by the bar wants to go home with me. You're more sober than me, how do you think she looks?"
"Don't worry, I unplugged the battery."
 
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